She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
