He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
How does it feel to date your dad?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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