You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
PANTIES FOUND
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
