sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
