Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
