win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
