Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
