These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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