i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
