Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
