Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
the day after is always just damage control
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
