so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
