i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
