yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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