We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
