Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
