We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
