dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
