I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
tell me about the fingering
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
