is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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