did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Randomize
