***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
he puts the penis in happiness.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
