Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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