these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
