Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Randomize
