dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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