So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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