So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
