dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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