I wish I only lived at night.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
This is classic penis vs brain.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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