Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
