i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
