Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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