i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
