3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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