I want to stick my p in your. b.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
