she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
