Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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