Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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