why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
