The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
