Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I think people are normalizing furries
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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