How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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