the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
My bed smells like the plague
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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