Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
