her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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