That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
