Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
