so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Randomize
