I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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